Daily Report!
by 111111111111112222222222111111
Summary: Since Discord and Luna came back they seen to have... troubles adapting to the new society. So Celestia created the daily reports, were the two inform her about their daily havoc. Bad summary, maybe a good story.


Celestia sighed heavily. It was the hardest part of her day: the daily review of Discord and Luna. At first she let Luna do whatever she felt like after she came back from the moon, but after some _accidents_ Celestia decided to create the daily reports. Soon after Discord was reformed he started to do the reports along with Luna. There was no doubt that both were good now, but there were still lots of problems, which was why the daily reports were created in the first place. She needed to hear whatever unnecessary crimes they did, and there were a lot of them.

"Alright." said Celestia. She looked up into the faces of Luna and Discord, who were both covered in jelly. "Tell me. What have the two of you done today?"

"I start!" Discord and Luna shouted with a smile. Celestia cringed. She did not like it when they were that excited.

"When we woke up in the morning, we went to a restaurant." Luna said "We politely asked the owner if we could have free food, since we are royalty."

"Unhappily, he refused." said Discord, and then he smirked "So I turned a random customer into a lobster and we borrowed her breakfast." Celestia stared at him.

"Please, tell me you remembered to turn her back."

"I think I didn't undo that one… yet."

"At least you did not harmed anypony seriously. Now, what did you do afterwards?" she asked. Luna gave her a thoughtful look.

"We decided to 'test' the royal guard, to see if they improved during the time we were trapped." said Luna. Celestia slowly blinked, she had heard the screaming coming from their training camp earlier that day. "You should have seen their panic attack, sister! The chocolate rain soaked them to the bone and some actually fainted when they saw me as Nightmare Moon!"

"I don't wanna hear that." Celestia interrupted "How many?"

"How many what?" answered Luna.

"How many civilians got in the way?"

"At least twenty, but they were probably part of our staff, anyway." said Luna.

"Probably not considering that they were tourists." Discord added.

"Oh, right." Celestia twitched her eye due to hearing this crazy talk "... and after that?"

"We found out that one of the guards had brought his daughter with him, so we took her with us for a little fun." said Discord.

"Oh mother…" Celestia whispered to herself.

"Don't worry, it was with actual toys and everything." said Luna.

"That's good…"

"And then we sort of tied her to one of my cotton-candy cloud and sent her to the Crystal Empire." added Discord. Celestia closed her eyes, clearly angry.

"Dear Mother! You two are too old to be doing these things." she said in a frustrated tone "She even agreed with this?"

"At first she resisted, but she calmed down after Discords gave her straw, so she could drink chocolate milk from the cloud during the trip." stated Luna.

"Just what did you do to her afterwards?"

"We dropped her off at her home... covered in cotton-candy and chocolate milk. Her mother wasn't very pleased." said Luna.

"Okay. Now will you kindly explain why you two are covered in jelly?" she asked. Discord and Luna looked at each other for a long while.

"We... saw a pony with huge jelly pots. So we bought one for ourselves." said Luna.

"Alright..."

"...and we accidently flooded your room with jelly..." Luna finished.

"Anything else?"

"I summoned a herd of dancing buffalos, they are probably at Blueblood's room right now." said Discord happily.

"And now we are in your office for our daily report!" Luna shouted. Celestia glared them down.

"Discord, what have I said about repressing your chaotic urges?"

"They are the only thing between regular me and stone me?" he answered.

"Correct. And what have I said about taking underage ponies to random places without their parents' knowledge?"

"It's… fun?" Luna tried.

"No, that's not what I said. I said that it's just plain wrong. Look, I know how new things are for the two of you, but that does not mean you can simply create chaos left and right and kidnap foals whenever you please." The duo stared at her, unaffected by her comments, "I let you two free instead of trapping you again. The very least you could do is restrict your daily havoc to, I don't know, stuff that the royal guards can deal with?"

"Can I still summon dancing buffalos and cotton-candy clouds?" Discord asked.

"What do you think?"

"I'll summon only small clouds and no more than twenty dancing buffalos." Discord smiled. Celestia sighed.

"Three dancing buffalos" Celestia said.

"Ten."

"five."

"Seven and we have a deal!"

"Fine, seven dancing buffalos. Whatever keeps you two from destroying Canterlot." sighed Celestia. "Your report is over. You may go."

"... Can Discord and I still play with underage-"

"Just go." said Celestia, pointing at the door. Discord and Luna left, having seemingly learned nothing. Celestia sighed, wondering if it was better to have imprisoned them once more.


End file.
